It started with a report on the BBC News website that told us that:

“The Greater Manchester Police officer crashed the £33,000 VW Golf R on Wharfside Way, Old Trafford, at about 01:50 GMT on 15 December.

The driver was taken to hospital and treated for a back injury.

A Greater Manchester Police spokesman refused to reveal details of how the crash happened.

He said that “as a result of the incident, GMP is reviewing its policy on officers test driving cars”.

The officer, who has recovered from his injuries, is currently suspended from driving duties while an internal investigation takes place.”

The photo of the car shows just how much damage was done: not just a little bit of superficial damage as you might expect from a shunt on an urban road.

It'll polish out with a bit of T-Cut

Now Section 19 of the Road Safety Act 2006 amends Section 87 of the Road Traffic Regulation Act 1984 which grants police an exemption from speed limits when a vehicle is being used for police purposes. “Police purposes” is a pretty wide-ranging description but you do have to wonder what on earth this officer was doing at that time of the morning at the sort of speeds he must have been doing to cause that sort of damage whilst, apparently, testing the car for possible police use.

But the story gets better: apparently the driver was PC Paul Fletcher who was regularly seen on the TV programme “Car Wars” doing high speed chases.

PC Paul Fletcher on "Car Wars"

And GMP stated that no other vehicle was involved, despite emerging reports that in fact the whole thing was caught on camera by another high performance car out at the same time on the same piece of road when PC Fletcher – a trained driver, remember - lost control on a roundabout. Hmm. Racing each other, perhaps? That’s surely what the police would say if you or I were doing the same thing?

Greater Manchester Police are, supposedly, reviewing their policies in this regard but surely testing a vehicle would be better done on, say, the MIRA test facilities which are purpose-built for such testing?

Maybe next time I get a pull for speeding – at a significantly lower speed than that which would have led to a car being written off so badly as the Golf – I could just say I was testing its suitability? Ah wait: I don’t have the exemption they’ll be hiding behind whilst driving as dangerously as they do…

Another year when they fail to deliver, due to their using that complete shower, Parcelnet/Hermes/Home Delivery Network/Yodel/Any Other Name We Can Think Of for so-called Premium Delivery.

Last year, they “lost” the packages of chocolates I was having delivered to my London office for the receptionists and Ops Director and Thorntons had to re-order.

This year, I paid for premium, next day delivery, so that delivery was due to take place on Tuesday, 13th to our SE1 offices. Guess what?

He must be lost.

Here’s the second package’s current tracking details:

Crap, eh?

So I went online, filled out the application details, sent them proof of address, etc. and then waited. Yesterday, I received a letter saying that due to my credit score from Experian, Citibank wouldn’t let me open the account.

It’s a current account with no credit card and no overdraft facility. No credit or borrowing required. So why should a credit score affect this? What a wunch of bankers!

I’ve now received two ‘strikes’ in 6 months from YouTube on an account of mine for videos I’d posted a couple of years ago. They’re not explicit or anything and yet – according to YouTube:

The following video(s) from your account have been disabled for violating the YouTube Community Guidelines:

• {Video Name}

Everyone hates spam. Misleading descriptions, tags, titles or thumbnails designed to increase views are not allowed. It’s also not OK to post large amounts of untargeted, unwanted or repetitive content, including comments and private messages.

This is the second Community Guidelines warning sanction your account has received within six months. Accordingly, the ability to post new content to YouTube from this account has been disabled and will not return until two weeks after you acknowledge this message. Please review the YouTube Community Guidelines and refrain from further violations, which may result in the termination of your account(s).

Helpful eh? Of course they’ve also helpfully removed my ability to actually access the ‘offending’ video but having looked at the one in question offline, I really, really don’t know what the hell they’re talking about.

So I thought I’d ask them to clarify what was wrong, but no. There’s no actual way on the YouTube site for me to be able to query this with anyone. How stupid are these people?

A few weeks ago, I decided to buy a new dishwasher. After looking on the John Lewis web site, I found a suitable model but it was out of stock. Currys’ website indicated they would price match as they were overpriced in comparison. Ringing them elicited the response that yes they would price match and take a further 10% off but no, we couldn’t order one until Friday as it was out of stock, but maybe we could find one in store.

Off to Grimsby Currys on the Saturday afternoon. After looking around at what they had in store, I eventually had to go and break up a cosy chat between four of their staff to get one of them, Jenny Noble, to actually sell us one as they were apparently uninterested in serving us. She graciously allowed us to make a purchase of an integrated dishwasher but as it was now 3.01pm, they wouldn’t deliver it on Sunday, as we’d missed the 3.00pm deadline…

We were told that delivery was free but that we could pay extra to have it delivered, installed and the old one disposed of. We were charged £20 extra for this.

So today it was delivered but we were told that the delivery man was only dropping the new one off as he had 5 minutes only and 30 deliveries to do.

We rang Currys who eventually said they would get Rob, the manager, to check with Jenny and ring me. They didn’t. I rang back and was told that no, she wouldn’t have made a mistake and the additional money we were charged was for … something else. After much to-ing and fro-ing, I was told that installation would cost another £100 but Rob would allow us 20% off that. I argued that we’d already paid for installation and after Curry’s Customer Services hung up on me after refusing to put me through to a supervisor, we were told that Rob had withdrawn his generous offer and if I wanted installation it would cost another £100.

I told them to come and collect it: it would be on the driveway.

In the meantime, my partner was telephoned and it was agreed that they would refund the £20 … but I’d have to go to Grimsby from London to get the refund! Eventually a few days later we actually got the refund.

So thanks to Rob at Curry’s Grimsby, we’re never, ever buying anything from Currys again, anywhere in the country. I already don’t buy from them online as Currys’ online prices are much more expensive than Amazon’s anyway. Oh and that will also extend to PC World who are part of the same group of companies.

“[Kentaro] said Kentaro would take a maximum of one million subscribers for the match – which he said equates to about 2.5 million viewers – because this would be the “safe number to stop at to ensure the optimal broadcast”.

Hmm. I’m not sure my broadband connection – as much as 768kbps at times… –  will ever provide “the optimal broadcast” for any streaming media.

“Andrew Croker, executive chairman of Perform, insisted England fans would “embrace” the internet broadcast.

“I think consumers are pretty sophisticated now, particularly in the UK, where we have been in the vanguard of adopting new technology,” he told BBC Sport.

“I think people want a choice – the chance to watch football in a different way. This is pioneering, very exciting and I think people will enjoy it.”

Yes it would be a different way for me – rather than high quality and effectively free broadcast on my television, I can have intermittent and choppy images on my Mac if I’m prepared to pay through the nose for it. Well guess what: I’m not!

It soon became apparent that my bundled call minutes would be insufficient for calling home regularly of an evening, so I decided to arrange for a landline through BT. This was set up and working on Wednesday this week – well done BT – and gives me free evening and weekend calls as I signed up for a year.

Now I started to have ‘issues’ with the Vodafone mobile broadband: my account gets billed mid-month, so to track usage, I have to use the full version of their software. Vodafone also compress images whether you want to or not but the full version allows you to modify the extent of this, whilst still having them compressed. I also cannot FTP files to webservers without them being cocked-up by Vodafone en route. In addition to this, one important aspect of my use would be to keep in touch with my kids over Windows Live Messenger but this does not work with the full version of the software.

The alternative is to use Vodafone’s “Lite” software. The downside with this is that the compression is worse and not adjustable by the user and the software only tracks usage on a month by month basis and not on my billing basis.

So I decided that I would sign up to broadband. BT are overpriced compared with other providers, so I decided on O2. According to their website, broadband is already activated on that line through Be Broadband … who are now part of O2, but because I’m not the customer of record, I would need to contact BT to have the tag removed: O2 blamed BT re-using that number for the cock-up.

After an hour and two dropped calls by BT – same old, same old – I was told there definitely isn’t a tag on that line, but according to their broadband checker:

“For Postcode [telephone number, not Postcode, removed] on Exchange BERMONDSEY

We’ve just tested your line and can confirm your line supports the UK’s most complete broadband package, BT Total Broadband. We estimate your maximum download speed to be 0.5 Mbps (Megabits per second).

Download speeds are dependent on a number of factors, such as the distance between your telephone exchange to your house and how many people are using broadband at the same time so whilst your broadband speed can vary, BT Total Broadband will always give you the maximum download speed available based on these factors.”

…which is frankly pathetic! Entering the postcode instead, I get this:

“For Postcode [removed] on Exchange CANARY WHARF

We’ve just tested your line and can confirm your line supports the UK’s most complete broadband package, BT Total Broadband. We estimate your maximum download speed to be 3.0 Mbps (Megabits per second).

Download speeds are dependent on a number of factors, such as the distance between your telephone exchange to your house and how many people are using broadband at the same time so whilst your broadband speed can vary, BT Total Broadband will always give you the maximum download speed available based on these factors.”

So it seems something is wrong somewhere!

Anyway, when I went through to O2 to place an order, entering the telephone number tells me this:

“Be broadband is currently activated on this BT landline number. Because Be is part of O2, you can move to O2 Broadband without any penalty and without giving Be your usual three month notice of cancellation. You’ll need to get a MAC key from Be before we can take your order though. So please raise a ticket through Be’s member centre (http://www.bethere.co.uk/memberhome.do), or give them a call on 0808 234 8566.”

It clearly isn’t, and that number seems constantly engaged. Ringing O2, they told me it definitely was so there must be a tag still on that number and that due to Data Protection Act issues, I would have to contact BT to get it removed.

So here I am: there isn’t or there is a tag on the line, which is either in Bermondsey or Canary Wharf neither of which will support anything much by way of line speed and which may or may not be in O2′s “Broadband” area – which is actually ADSL2+ – and may or may not be in O2′s “Home Broadband” area which is slower and more expensive.

{sigh} Wouldn’t it be good to get the right answer to the question first time?

So far, so good.

I have a couple of ride-outs coming up in a few weeks, so it’s time for me to apply for a tax disc to run from 1 April – I’ll do 6 months which will take me through my riding season from Kawasaki Day at the Ace Café London through to the ZRXOC Medbourne Meet in September.

Bearing in mind, you have to allow sufficient time for postage, etc. I thought I’d tax it today to run from 1 April.

No. You can’t do that. The stupid system will only accept my taxing the bike from 1 March, so the Government is insisting I pay tax for the last 24 days, plus however long it would take for the tax disc to arrive after they process the application tomorrow. Let’s see … yes, it would probably arrive around the 1 April and I’d have been unable to use the bike for the first month of the six I’d have paid for, plus I wouldn’t be legal if I wanted to do the September meet.

Absolutely useless!

Of course this is operated by the same people who tried to claim that the latest Budget was all for environmentally friendly vehicles … whilst upping the tax for bikes. Bikes that are perfect for single ‘occupancy’ commutes. And those that do not cause congestion…

And guess what?

Yes, someone managed to get £500 out of his account!

Got to love this bit though:

“The bank cannot find out who did this because of the Data Protection Act and they cannot stop it from happening again.”

Ah! The Nanny State, eh?

So we tend to delete all the ‘useful’ information and just leave the e-mail addresses they helpfully include so that other spammers can offer them viagra, tickets for rugby matches and those missing millions from Nigeria. Here’s hoping anyway.

I thought I’d start posting their e-mail addresses on here (and hence on the sites carrying the syndicated RSS feeds) so that other can avail themselves of their bargain wares … or something.

Here’s the latest: ipho...@europemail.com iph...@ommail.com ipho...@yahoo.com